Host with the most

I grew up in a time where playtime meant getting lost. We would spend hours in the woods, building forts, getting chased by dogs, swinging on frayed rope out over a rushing creek. Our parents had no idea where we were or what we were doing. We knew to come home when we were hungry, thirsty or when it got dark. Sometimes we would try to sneak in the house with a group to watch TV or raid the fridge, and we would be met with an emphatic "go outside!"

Todays parenting is much different. We are flooded with information and advice on what to do and what not to do. We are attacked by images on the evening news of abductors, molesters and other disasters. We navigate these waters of information like a defense missile, trying to explode each one that comes in our radar. Unfortunately, this has created a loss of freedom for kids these days. Many years ago there were broad fears and our kids would have drills during school hours for "bombs" or "tornados". Today they have drills for "stranger in the building" where they are told to find a place to hide that no one can see them. It is sad for us, but normal for them, I suppose. Still, it brings a special worry into parenting that was never there before.

The positive side of this is that we see our kids grow up in a much more intimate way. We are the hosts to our child's adventures and friendships; planning get-togethers, organizing activities and coordinating groups of friends. We get to hear what they talk about and see them laughing and playing, up close. I don't think my mom ever saw me play with a friend or heard us giggle about something silly. She wasn't there to comfort me when I got hurt because by the time I got home, I was done crying and basically just needed a band-aid. Now I have a front row seat and have gotten to know each special kid that walks through my door. Each friend is a window into a different part of my child, for I can see his/her uniqueness and why they became a chosen friend.

Whenever I have a crowd of kids around, I like to feed them. One day, a bunch of teenagers gathered at my house. I knew not to insert myself into any of the conversations, so I stayed in the kitchen and decided to bake cookies. I could hear them walking in and out of the house, talking and laughing. As I finished baking the cookies, I found my heart (which I put aside just for me). They soon migrated towards that chocolatey aroma where they devoured the rest of the batch in a few hours. How I love my kids and their friends! I am so lucky to be included in this little window since it won't be open much longer. And after everyone leaves, I love seeing my kids smiling, happy and thankful for having those special friends and being able to share our home with them.